With Heart Divided Prologue

01/12/2013 Posted by mindsinger

Before I tell you my story, let me introduce you to Molly. She is six years old, forever young, forever a child. And she has secrets.

Molly sat in Sunday school and listened to her teachers tell her about God. She sang, “Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so…” with hands folded in her lap. She listened to her teachers tell her how God cares for and protects those whom He loves. How he saved Daniel in the lion’s den, David from Goliath, and the children of Israel from Pharaoh’s army. Molly listened and she never told them it was a lie. She never told them God did not love her. She never told them God abandoned her to a brother twelve years older than she.
She didn’t tell anyone. Her silence had been guaranteed by the memory of a new-born kitten whose legs and tail had been cut off, and whose eyes had been gouged out with a knife.
So Molly grew up with a heart divided. She carefully put away the truths no one wanted to hear. She buried them deep in her soul and never thought of them again with her conscious mind.
But her soul knew. And it built barriers against the lies she thought she had been told. God would not take care of her. No one would. Only she could care for herself. And she did. She became so adept at playing Church that she fooled even herself. She learned all the right answers and all the proper responses. She was always busy. In school she was the girl who could do anything. Art, music, literature, you name it; she did it, and very well. When she began dating, she did that very well, too; all proper and Christian.
SUPER CHRISTIAN. That was the tag that hung from Molly’s heart. She was so busy being busy she didn’t have time to examine the strangely silent soul. No time to wonder why “God is Love” rang false or why she could not respond in her heart to the beautiful words she sang and spoke.
Oh, there were times when the emptiness threatened to swallow her up. Sometimes she would break down, become depressed, but she did not know why. Only that she felt empty and alone and ugly. Only that she must do more and stay busy building the person God wanted Molly to be. But there came a time when the questions would not be silent; when answers rumbled in the distance like thunder before a storm. The real Molly was speaking!

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WHAT DID THEY SEE?

12/07/2012 Posted by mindsinger

Did you ever stop to think that a newborn baby doesn’t need to do a thing but lie there and sleep to be endlessly fascinating? We don’t expect him to react to baby talk or smile at us or even open his eyes to captivate us. But somewhere tucked away in our hearts is a picture of all the things this baby will mean to his family; all the wobbly first steps, the smiles, the excitement of first words, and the promise of a new life. So, what did the shepherds see in this child they had found? How about Mary and Joseph? What did they think as they studied his face and counted fingers and toes?
The shepherds’ hearts were filled with the splendor and music of Heaven. They knelt before the child the angels had called a Savior and Christ the Lord. The humble stable – a place familiar to keepers of sheep – disappeared and all their attention was centered on this wonder before them. They had had no time to think of Isaiah’s beautiful words or call to mind the many other prophecies about the child. But they had seen Heaven opened and knew He had come from that glorious place There was no room for doubt in their minds.
Mary smoothed the downy head and tried to forget the crown of thorns that would one day rest there. “There will be time for mothering! He need not be Messiah for a few years. He will be my child and I will keep him warm and I will love him!” For nine months her thoughts had vacillated between wonder and dread. She had listened as scripture was read in the Synagogue and knew they spoke of her son. The first wonder at the news had softened into awareness of the new life growing within her and kept her thoughts on the soft warmth of his newness and the tenderness of a new baby.
Joseph was as much in awe of the child as the shepherds; but he had had nine months to ponder the scripture passages about the Messiah. He had memorized many of the prophetic scriptures and he knew with certainty from where this child originated. He knew that Isaiah had seen him, high and lifted up, with the Seraphim thundering his praise in the throne room of Heaven. He knew this child had somehow left the glory that had been his since before time began and allowed himself to be born into the home of a poor carpenter. “Where is the glory hidden?” he asked himself. “You are God in man, yet you give yourself into our care! I helped Mary deliver our Deliverer! God help me to be your protector!”
Each one saw the Child through mortal eyes and each kept the wonder of that night as a warm hope in their hearts. Yes, a baby was born that night; born as all babies are born, and in conditions as poor as many millions of babies are born today. I wonder if any saw the echoes of glory in his eyes.

Autumn

10/15/2012 Posted by mindsinger

Golden is the Autumn,

dancing in her veils of splendor;

laughing through the woodlands,

pirouetting on the hillsides,

and brushing frosty moonlight from her hair.

Bittersweet the taste of apples

on her lips of tempting crimson;

silver slippers tripping lightly

over fields of ripening corn.

One by one her veils slip earthward

leaving carpets sweetly resting

upon future bursts of color

sleeping now in pregnant slumber.

Now she swirls in ardent motion

as her wrappings fly far from her

‘til at last she stands resplendent

bare-limbed and reaching skyward.

Golden Autumn leaves us lonely

for the masterpiece so lovely

that she paints upon the canvas

of our summer-weary hearts.

c. Donna Swanson