Posts Tagged: ‘Donna Swanson’

RACHEL’S DAUGHTERS: the other side of Christmas

12/14/2011 Posted by mindsinger

 


(Rachel is visiting her mother in Bethlehem. She is pregnant with her first child and unable to sleep.)
Rachel turned, pushing the coarse woolen cloak from her shoulder.  One bare foot stretched into the coolness of the night.  She couldn’t sleep.  She was thirsty.  She rose quietly from the bench, gathered her cloak and walked to the water jar by the door.

Dipping a cup of water from the stone container, she drank, then slipped on her sandals and stepped into the yard.   The air was chilly but her cloak was warm and she sat in the moonlight beneath the olive tree.  The fragrance of herbs and flowers filled the night air and the stars were a shining canopy above her.   Rachel’s thoughts turned to her mother.

“Oh, Jehovah, please heal her.  I need her so much.”  As if in response to her worry, the child she was carrying rolled and kicked reminding her of that need.  “How will I nourish and care for this little one without her wise counsel?”Tears stung her eyes and traced the soft curve of her cheek.  “Jehovah, mighty God of Father Abraham, hear my prayer.  Heal my mother with your mighty power.  You who named the stars, who made a nation from slaves!”  Her voice faltered.  Who was she to tell God his business?   “I leave her in your loving hands, Father.  Amen.”

Rachel sat quietly until, lifting her head and flexing her shoulders, she realized how chilly the air had become.  How long had she been sitting here?   She rose from the bench and walked to the grapevine, plucked a small stem of fruit and turned back to the house. As she turned, she saw a strange glow in the sky coming from the hills beyond Bethlehem.  The faintest stirring of music trembled on the air as her ears tensed to catch it.      Music?  How could there be music?  The light pulsed and flickered, so faint, yet so real.  She fell to her knees beside the bench. She could almost hear words in the music.

She strained to see, to hear the distant sound.  The low hills around the shepherds’ caves shone with a dancing light.   Mystery, a sense of awesome power, made her tremble with emotion.      Then, the glow faded.  The night was silent –a chilly Bethlehem night.  She looked around, feeling foolish for kneeling in a dark, empty yard.   Awkwardly she rose from the ground, pulled her cloak more closely around her shoulders and made her way back to bed.  A feeling of peace settled over her as warm as the cloak she drew over her body and, as sleep overtook her, she wondered if what she had experienced was an illusion.  Had she really heard music?

~*~

(Later, Rachel is telling her parents what she experienced but is interrupted.)
Rachel turned to answer him.  But before she could speak, Jacob burst into the house.  ”Rachel!  Simeon, it’s happened!  You’ve got to see Him!  Wait ’til I tell you what happened to us last night!”  His eyes danced and his hands trembled as he took Rachel’s face between them. “I’ve seen angels and I’ve seen the Messiah!  Oh, Rachel!  He’s come, He’s come!”

“Jacob, what are you saying?  Why aren’t you with the sheep?  What are you doing in Bethlehem?”      ”Let me sit down and catch my breath.”  Rachel’s husband pulled up the low stool, filling the room, as he always did, with his lively presence. “Forgive me, Naomi, how are you feeling?  Rachel left word you were ill.”

Naomi waved aside his query, “I’m feeling better, Jacob.  Tell us your news!”

“Yes. Let me start from the beginning.”  He grew still, collecting his thoughts. “We were to stand night watch for the flocks. David and Gideon took the dogs and settled the sheep while Dan and I gathered a quick supper.”  He turned to Rachel, who set a plate of food before him.  ”That’s when Rahab told me you’d come down here.”      The food remained untouched as he continued, “We had the flock settled for the night.  Gideon and I drew the first watch, and I was enjoying the peace and bright moonlight.”  In a voice filled with wonder, Jacob continued. “I was looking at the stars when, all of a sudden, the heavens became brighter than noonday.  The trees, the rocks, the sheep, everything was shining. And then I saw a man standing in the sky!  I know it sounds unbelievable, but he was.  And he wasn’t just a man.  He was dressed in robes brighter than the light, and his hair was like polished brass. I knew he must be an angel.  And then he began to glow even brighter.”

His audience listened with rapt attention.  ”The light seemed to come from him and from around him, too.  Gideon and I fell on our faces in fear.  The dogs began barking.  Dan and David woke up to all the light, and they were as terrified as we were.  Just when our fear was greatest, the angel spoke.”

“He spoke to you?!” Rachel’s eyes went wide with wonder.

“Yes!  He said, ‘Don’t be afraid, for I bring you good news of great joy.’  I’ll never forget those words!  ’Great joy to all people.’ He said, ‘Unto you is born this day in the City of David, a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.’ And then he gave us a sign. He said we would find the babe in a manger, wrapped in swaddling clothes.”

“And you found Him?”  Naomi touched the hand of her son-in-law.

“We did.  But before we left, the sky opened up and we saw thousands of angels!  They were praising God, and they promised us peace here on earth.”

“Then what, Jacob?” Simeon leaned toward the young shepherd.

“We set the dogs to watch the flocks and headed for Bethlehem.  I told the others that Eli would know where to find the baby if anyone did, so we went to the inn and woke him up.  He wasn’t happy to see us at that hour of the night, and he said no baby had been born there.     “But when we started telling him about the angels, he raised his hand to stop us.

He said he just remembered a young couple who had stopped there the night before.  ’I could see the woman was at the end of her strength, so I told the stable boy to put fresh straw in one of the stalls out in the stable.’

“That’s it! I told the others. The angel said a manger!’  We hurried to the cave where they kept the animals.  You know how big Eli’s cave is.  There were animals everywhere. But Eli had his lantern, and guided us to the back where one pen had been curtained off from the rest.  A young man met us there and asked us why we’d come.  I told him we’d come to worship the Savior.  And, you know, he didn’t seem at all surprised.  He just gave us a smile and motioned us in.     “A candle burned above the stall but we wouldn’t have been able to see without the lantern Eli carried.”  Jacob paused and looked tenderly at Rachel, “How pure and sweetly that little one slept, Rachel.  His mother lay resting on the straw, but her husband picked up the child so we could see better.  We fell to our knees as the words of the angel echoed in our hearts,  ’A Savior, who is Christ, the Lord.’  Oh, Rachel!  We saw the Messiah!”

“How did he look, Jacob?  How did you know it was Him?”

“It’s hard to explain,” Jacob answered. “He looked like any newborn baby, but we sensed a presence there. It was as though we could still feel the angels standing around us.  No, kneeling around us!  All of heaven was worshipping with us.  Shepherds, Rachel, the angels came to shepherds!”

~*~

(The Christ Child has come, but danger has come to Bethlehem and Rachel is hurrying back to her home, the shepherd’s cave in the hills.  Suddenly, a band of soldiers meets them on the road…)
The second soldier drew his sword and thrust it through thesmall body dangling from his captain’s hand.  Barak’s screamswere cut short and his lifeless body flung back at Rachel.Struggling to her feet as the body struck her chest, she fellwith Barak in her arms.A voice is heard in Ramah, weeping and great mourning,Rachel weeping for her children and refusing to be comforted,because they are no more!

~*~
This is an excerpt from the book, RACHEL’S DAUGHTERS: The Other Side of Christmas.  It is available from Amazon.com.

http://www.amazon.com/RACHELS-DAUGHTERS-ebook/dp/B002TG4PAY/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1323891737&sr=1-2

THE JOURNEY BEGINS

12/05/2011 Posted by mindsinger

 

We’re going on a journey, you and I.

We’re going into the wilderness in search of a child.

It will be a difficult journey, but she’s worth it.

 

You see, someone told her to hide.

And no one else told her she didn’t have to do that.

They told her to be good;

To be helpful;

To be quiet;

To love God,

And to obey her elders.

But no one told her she didn’t have to hide.

 

They said, “Children should be seen and not heard!’

“I’m busy, go play.”

They said, “don’t interrupt when we’re busy,

Or talking,

Or resting.”

But no one said, “Don’t listen to him or do what he says.”

 

So she carefully hid herself from them.

She became a conspirator in a game she didn’t want to play.

She’s hiding now.

Her screams are silent,

Her rage is bound within clenched jaws

And knotted stomach.

 

The walls of her dungeon are thick and high.

It’s hard to see people through them.

It’s especially hard to see God.

 

But she has left us clues,

Because she doesn’t want to stay there.

She wants to break out and dance in the sunshine.

She wants to know it’s OK to be pretty and femine;

And even sexy.

 

But the fear that caused her to build her own prison

Is very strong.

And it’s hard to trust those who would tear down the walls.

After all, he might be gone but the rage is not.

Where will the rage go?

Who will it hurt?

Will it be as uncontrollable as a breaking dam?

She has a lot to fear.

 

We know she’s nearby.

We can feel her trembling.

We can almost hear her telling her story,

Over

And over

And over.

Endlessly repeating it where no one hears.

Keeping the grown-up child so busy

She can’t concentrate on important things.

 

The whispering child sitting in the darkness;

Holding tightly to all the feelings I need to feel.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

c.1998 Donna Swanson

 

 

 

MY SAFE PLACE

 

You were always there

being faithful,

when I could not trust;

being strong

when I was afraid to be weak.

 

You were the Oak

when my weeping willow heart

could not bear to put down roots.

 

You were always there loving me

in spite of myself.

Holding me

with all my prickles;

accepting me

when I could only pretend to give.

 

When anger I could not acknowledge

pushed you away,

you only went far enough

to give me space.

 

Not knowing the source of my pain,

I lashed out at life.

Not knowing the source of my pain,

you bore it with me.

 

How far we have come, my love;

finding friendship in the autumn,

finding love in the twilight.

 

Let the poets sing of young love

and the fires of youth.

We will write our sonnets on yellowed pages

and find them sweeter than springtime!

 



 

FLIGHT

11/27/2011 Posted by mindsinger


I stand upon the threshold,
and my new self laughs with delight
at the prospects before me.

I stand upon the threshhold
and my old self whispers dire warnings
of disillusionment.

Ah, but I know!
The self that cowered before life
was but a travesty of life.
Far better to have loved!

My shell lies shattered

the nest has blown away
in the winds of change
and the dove must fly.

The air is sweet
and the sunlight is dazzling
as on trembling wings
I look down upon the treetops.

There was shelter there
and sweet showers.
Others fed me and nurtured me.
It might prove lonely up here.

What if my wings should break?
There are other fledglings in the nest now.
And they look to me for food.
Give me soft wings of iron, Father!

Plant the wonder of this gift
deep in my soul
that it may produce food
for the fledglings.

Turn my thoughts outward
away from these hurts –
both real and imagined –
of long ago.

I would fly free
on wings that glisten
and move in rhythm
to your heartbeat.

And yet I would be bound
by silken cords of love
to the hearts of my brothers and sisters,
that I might give them words
for their own songs!

c . 2000, Donna Swanson